Thanksgiving.

There’s a loaded word!

Sure, it’s about giving thanks for the blessings we have. There is so much to be thankful for. And it’s about being with family and/or friends.

But what if this is one Thanksgiving that’s sending your head spinning in circles of “What if’s”?

What if your cousin starts talking about how glad she is that Trump won?

What if your niece starts talking about what an ass Trump was when he did x, y, or z and how scared she is for her gay friends?

What if your husband lambasts Clinton for x, y, or z?

You get the drill. No matter where you fall on the political spectrum, there’s likely to be someone at the table who’s at the other end.

Worry, fear, gloating, judgement. These will likely be in plentiful supply at many tables.

Ugh. It’s exhausting just thinking about it. It could get messy.

How do you stay sane and peaceful in the midst of it?

Well, first, maybe that’s not what you choose to do. Maybe you want to join in the fray. Hey, no judgement here. You feel what you feel, and it’s totally your call what you want to contribute to the group energy.

But when the dust has cleared, what will you wish you had done? Who will you wish you had been?

If you want to contribute to love and connection tomorrow — and not fear and distance, here are some suggestions:

Set an intention

Set your intention to embody a high energy emotion. This will be an antidote to the low vibration energy emotions of fear and judgement, etc. Choose an emotion from the list below and set your intention to look for opportunities to find this in others and FEEL it yourself.

Low vibration energies block the light in us. They hijack our brains. They separate us from each other and isolate us. An untrained, unfocused mind can easily get trapped in low vibration responses to whatever shows up. And low vibration emotions don’t solve problems…they compound them.

Choose one of these instead:

1. Curiosity. Make it your business to get curious and try to understand where people are coming from. What drives the choices they make? You can do this directly (if done with true love as your intent)…”I know and love you, _______, and I’m so curious to understand more about _______.” Or you can just choose to put aside what you believe you know to be true, and pay attention to what actually shows up in what someone says and does. Look beyond the obvious. If someone is angry and lashing out, there is hurt there. Be curious about the hurt.
2. Compassion. Look for things you can notice or learn about the people at the table that would open your heart to them. Get in their shoes.
3. Connection. Look for ways to connect with people (and to connect people with each other). Ask them about what’s going on their lives. You might consider suggesting that everyone shares a blessing, a challenge, and an opportunity in their lives. When you build connection, you build bridges that make it harder to go into judgement and fear and polarization.
4. Gratitude. Catalog the things you are grateful for throughout the day. When you count the things you are grateful for, you shift your brain chemistry.
5. Laughter. How could you insert fun or laughter into the day?

Choose who you bring to the table

Bring a calm version of you to the table. When you get up tomorrow, take some time for you. Journal, meditate, color, dance, read something inspiring, listen to music that makes you want to dance. Any of these activities will help calm your nervous system, activating the “love” part of your brain (and de-activating the “fear and judgement” part).

What to do if you slip

If you find yourself slipping in to fear, anxiety, or judgment of yourself or others, notice it, forgive it, and redirect your attention back to your focus word.

Review whether this worked for you

At the end of the day, review whether this did, indeed, lift your experience of the day. If it did, use it again! If it didn’t, how can you tailor the strategy so that it is effective for you?

You may not be able to navigate the day without being pulled into the muck. That’s okay. No one’s got this peace stuff down all of the time (at least no one I know).

Let me know how it goes!

I am so grateful for each and every one of you! I’ll be sending you beams of love tomorrow.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Much love,

Ellie

P.S. Did you find this helpful? Please let me know!